I have a friend named Jay . But for short , he likes to be called J .

What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

Hello penis

while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

An american family is picknicking on the bottom of the ocean. They are eating french fries, big mac's, chicken mc nuggets and drinking coca cola, some slurpies too, all purchased at the local mac donalds near lyndon blvd, in chevy chase near that weird house with the toothless lady that always smiles and then all of a sudden frowns at you, often wearing either a dark green or mint green dress. Spongebob squarepants comes drifting by dead in circular pants and little Sally, their youngest daughter asks a question, which cannot be heard because they're underwater.

knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

Why was the boy crying? His parents were brutally burned to death in a fiery car accident.

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

yo mama's so dumb, she had to retake the 11th grade.

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

You know whats funny? A man cooking dinner.

Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

silver bullet?

Let me guess, you where really ready to Not not tell me that.

A baby seal walks into a club.

A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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