what is 3+3= 8

- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

What do a black man and a bench have in common? The black man can sit in the bench.

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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