What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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What is the best thing the French ever invent The two piece

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPONGEBO... nope bin laden

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Turkey Balls

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What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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What did the meteorologist say when there was tornado? There is a tornado 7 miles West of the station.

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

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What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

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Why did the chicken go down the road? He was in a KFC truck and was headed to his death...

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says "It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave"

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Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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So there's this big ass bronco right? It goes to a store and it asks Ben Roethlisberger "Do you know where I can find some girls to rape?" Ben Roethlsiberger says "In aisle 5" so the moose goes down to aisle 5 but there aint no girls!

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How many black men can you fit into a mini? Five One in the drivers seat. One in the passenger seat. And three in the back seats. Anymore would be both dangerous and impractical due to the small interior volume of the car, and it would also put a significant strain on the cars limited engine power. Especially when tackling a steep incline.

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops