How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

So many dudes win with your mom who even knows if i'm your father!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Did you hear about the guy who broke his legs? His legs were broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into a bar, gets caught in a knife fight, and dies horribly. The funeral was closed casket.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse then one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse then two bee stings? The Holocaust . What worse then the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

2 boy once went to a party. One boy dared the other to suck all the helium out of a balloon. Today this boy is know as Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Three men of different ethnic and socio-economic upbringings enter a pub. A strange situation befalls them or a question is posed. The first two respond in turn, in manners typical of their profession or educational background. The third, however, either draws on his specific expertise and responds so as to outwit the others, or makes an egregious and pun-filled blunder, leaving himself open to mockery by his peers.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

thumb_up thumb_down -18

"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did the ocean say to the other ocean????? What Nothing they just waved ???? Oh Do you sea what I did there ???? No I'm shore you did ???? By Erin

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you fit 100 dead babies into a box? Put them into a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call 20 Investment Bankers buried to their necks in sand? A team building exercise at the beach sponsored by an Investment Bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Breaking news! An 18 wheeler has gone loose and hit a playground damaging a swing, 1 fatality and 16 children injured 5 in critical condition

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's like a whale and has a sprained leg? MATT ROSS THE FAT ARSE!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops