What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

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What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

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Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

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Once upon a time, there was a cat. He died.

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Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a blue whale? A: About 10 pounds.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Man goes into a bar and orders 7 shots, the bartender says "Long day, huh?", the Man says yeh then goes home and kills himself.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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