A man is mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he reaches down to see if something's stuck in the blades. What does he pull out? His finger.

How do you make a mime talk? Put a gun to his head.

So a hispanic man and a black man jump from a tree, which one hits the ground first? The hispanic man, the rope caught the black man.

Knock knock. Who's there? Mike. Oh, come in.

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

How do you make a baby stop crying? You slit it's throat.

What do you call a black guy who gives out change? A cashier.

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was wandering and had no idea wht it was doing because it has very little mental capacity whatsoever

In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

Why do all black people have AIDS? Because they deserve it.

what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

Your dad walked into a bar. It was a gay bar.

HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

What did the man say when he lost his keys? I lost my keys. What did the man say when he saw an elephant in the distance? There is an elephant in the distance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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