Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

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Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

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A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

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What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

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Why was the man sad? His wife left

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

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Get Outta Here We're Closed!

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whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: A sad, unfortunate dog.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

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How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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