I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

What's worse the a bee sting? Two bees stings What's worse the two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse the. The Holocaust? Three bee stings

Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

A bar walks into a man

My mom farted, now it smells, ewe. My mom just took of her shirt, BONER! My, friends mom took off her shirt, now he has a boner. We both have boners, and it smells bad. This is weird, me and my friend are very similar, except my mom farted and his mom did not. Now I hate my mom. UN-BONER!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

Click here to end the world.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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