A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

A muslim, a priest, and a raabi walk into a bar. All three of them agree that it hurt.

whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

Presidents are black Rappers are white Welcome to 2011

A man walks into an illegal brothel. He is a cop. He takes them back to the police station and questions them in a completely asexual manner.

Why are Asians so good at math? because of their work ethic and determination to become the best at everything.rice.

Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

Q: What is scarier than the boogie man? A: Herpes

Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

your moms so fat that she had to buy bigger cloths, her husband left her, she became a druggie and died alone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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