What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

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What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartendor says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife was just diagnosed with cancer and given only a week to live."

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A man went back in time and warned nobody about anything and pretended to be from the time he choose to go to and lived a happy life eventually finding a wife. He later found out he had a baby on the way, he named it after his great grandfather who was a war hero. He later found out that many years later his son had a son and they named it after his grandpa. He went to the hospital where he died just as his grandson had a baby and they named it after his father. The man died. End.

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What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

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Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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what does a horny frog say RUBIT RUBIT

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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woman's rights

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A dog run after a squirrel. the pursuit didn't last long the squirrel climb a tree.

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How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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