I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

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kieran is a homosexual

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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a cop wrote most of these anti-jokes O.o

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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CAOIMHIN. IVE BEEN DOING MY WORK SINCE IVE STARTED THIS CLASS. YOU'VE STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. I WROTE BIG MAC'S AND THATS IT. SO STFU

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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If the joke below mine says something about a mom its from adam he sucks ...

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dyslexics of the world untie!

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What do you call a gay man in a wheelchair? Nothing, his life is already hard enough and bullying him will only make the problem worse.

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You are joking right?

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How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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