When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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Did you hear what happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in spring training.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

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Why did h little boy drop his ice cream? Jerry Sandusky was behind him.

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

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Excuses are like assholes: Gay men like to have sex with them.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

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What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops