What's long and black The unemployment line

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

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Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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i named my son Frodo because he was little

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

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What do you call a black elephant? An elephant.

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Waffles ate my grandma

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

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Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

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Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

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What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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What do you call an argument between a Jew and a German? World War 2

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Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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And so the Lord said unto John "Come forth and receive eternal life," but John came fifth, and won a toaster instead.

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Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops