How do the Chinese name their children? They decide on a name that both parents can agree upon, and they write that on the certificate of birth.

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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Who won the race through the underpass, the black man or the polish man? The black man as he crossed the finish line several seconds earlier.

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

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Why did the black boy fail out of high school? Because his grades were bad.

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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