Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Sex

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Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

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poop.

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How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

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What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

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If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

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Mary had a little lamb Little lamb Mary had a little lamb That Mary wanted to blow Because Mary was into beastiality

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What happened when the high school student had intercourse with his history teacher? orgasmic noises.

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2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

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Why do you never want to party with Lindsay Lohan? Because she's a drug abuser and a terrible influence.

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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Why did the woman go to the kitchen? The same reason she went to the bathroom, she needed to wash her hands because she was finger painting. Her husband was using the bathroom.

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My mother has chlamydia. That's it.

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

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A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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