There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

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Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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Yo mama is so fat when she went to the fat contest they said SORRY no pros alowed

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What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

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A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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What happened to my sunglasses?

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How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

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"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

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Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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