A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

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What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

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What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

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A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

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why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

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Why was Johnny so mad at his father? Because his father had a constant drinking problem and was very abusive.

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

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'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

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How old are you? 7

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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Two men walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O!" The second man says "I'll have some H2O too!" Both men get water, because the bartender knows better than to give someone dihydrogen dioxide.

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whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

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What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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