What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

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Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

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How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

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Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops