Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

Why did the elephant climb the tree? Because he didn't want to tie his shoe.

You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

What do you call a gay man having sex with a woman? Sex.

Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

why is kool-aid so sweet? Because it contains sugar

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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