A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

mike:what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas tom:cancer ahahahaha mike:he got a skateboard jerk nararrator: this skate board will be worth less because he has no legs

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black person flying an airplane? The pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

thumb_up thumb_down -15

E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Adam Chebali is awesome

thumb_up thumb_down -15

This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Poker? I barely even know her.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the Chef go to jail? He killed his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops