Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

Why does life hand you lemons? Because it sucks enough, so it wants you to have some.

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

What did Helen Keller say to her mother? Nothing coherent.

Ask me if i'm a serial killer Are you a serial killer? Yes and I killed your family

Everybody will die

Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

TWO PADDIES PASS A PUB

Manchester City

Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

What did Timmy want for Christmas? Parents.

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

Why did the black man get some Kool-Aid? Because he was thirsty, and thought Kool-Aid would be able to quench his thirst.

How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

what do you call a jew hanging from a tree? dead

Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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