What's yellow and talks? A talking giraffe.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

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In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

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What did one dolphin say to the other after watching a banana dance with an afro. My pancreas was replaced with a mango.

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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Q: What did the lesbian say to her partner? A: We cannot get married in forty five states.

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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N-E Pats never cheated

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Holy sh** a talking muffin!!!

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

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Indians

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What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

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A man walks into a bar an orders a few pints. He then goes home and brutally rapes his wife and chains his staring kids to a fencepost in the backyard along with their deceased dog named Spot.

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Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

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Yo mama so ugly that she often has trouble being attractive towards people of the opposite gender

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so 3 guys are a plane George W. Bush, a mexican, and a chinese man. the plane is going down because of too much weight they haave to throw things out. The mexcan throws out a suitcase full of tacos and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then the chinese throws out a suitcase full of rice and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then George W. Bush pushes the mexican out and says "we have to enough of these in out country."

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An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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