What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

What did superman say when he flew into a building? Flying is inhumanly possible unless in an aircraft vehicle.

what do you call it when everyone becomes tolerant about gender identity. whatever pronoun it prefers.

T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

White men's rights

A young boy had a question and looked into the sky then his eyes got burnt from the sun and he went blind.

Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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