What did michael jackson say to the boys he touched? Nothing. Hes dead

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How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

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If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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What do you get if you put a lepper in front of a fan A mess

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What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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Ebola

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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