Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

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Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, nor does the chicken because it's a chicken.

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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Teacher: Pop quiz time class. Sally, what year did we first land on the moon? Sally: It was 1969. Teacher: That is correct. Larry, who killed JFK? Larry: What? I didn't do it, I wasn't even born yet! Teacher: Just answer the question Larry: But sir, I swear I would never do that. You have to believe me. Teacher: Larry, you're an idiot

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops