Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How many Alzheimer patients does it take to make the bed? How ma......

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Kevin and Ramin

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats worse than having a worm in your apple? Having one in your intestins.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Open up. We have a warrant for your arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The diamond one below is hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you stop a man from jumping off a building? Push him off a building.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what did the man say to then other man when he said a joke, "Ha"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. Who's there? It's me. Oh, come on in. Thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops