What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

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What do you call a cup that holds liquid A cup

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

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silver bullet?

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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