What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

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Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

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"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A whine cellar.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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Chuck Norris got hit by a train. It was a very bloody and sad incident and he will be missed.

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

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What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

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Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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knock, knock who's there? Dave. ....oh well dave's not here man.

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what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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Laugh.

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what long green and bumpy? a pickle

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knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops