Man: Hey honey! you look mighty fine today! Want to go play some lax? Woman: I'd love to! Thanks babe! Man: Just kidding you are a woman.

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Female rights.

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Knock Knock Who's there? a tree

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Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

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Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

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Howdy stranger.... It is time for you to join! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! Moral: "HEY YOU! STFU! STFU! STFU! STFU!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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