A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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G:nock nock B:come in!

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A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

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What do you call a black man at school the janitor

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An man walks to a bra

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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A Fairly ghetto African-American male and a Korean Merchant pass each other on the streets of L.A. two weeks after the Rodney King riots, what happens? The merchant nods his head to say hello to the African-American and the African-American male does the same and they both live out sucessful lives. By the way the African-American just got accepted to Harvard on a scholarship program.

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A preschool teacher told his class to draw a squirrel. One child proceeds to break into tears. The teacher says "what's wrong Johnny?" Johnny said "my whole family was slaughtered by a gang of squirrels!" this upset the teacher

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a platypus? Well, I don't think it's genetically possible by nature, but Turtpus is a pretty funny name.

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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Q: What do a hockey coach and a bar stool have in common? A: because seven ATE nine

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An Irish man, Scots man and a Welsh man walk into a bar. The barman says, "what is this some kind of joke?!" Peter, who lives in Cardiff, returned home, depressed that he is viewed as some sort of clown. It reminded him of when he was a school boy; a giant spot appeared on his nose. The kids just laughed at him. "Don't worry Peter" he said to himself, "It will all be over now... He later hung himself. His family have been informed.

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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