Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

A man bought a white van, He later brutally molested a small boy.

What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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