Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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im @ work, LOL.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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Im gay What about you

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Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

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Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

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What's worse then one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse then two bee stings? The Holocaust . What worse then the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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A man walks into a bar, gets caught in a knife fight, and dies horribly. The funeral was closed casket.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

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What do you call 20 Investment Bankers buried to their necks in sand? A team building exercise at the beach sponsored by an Investment Bank.

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Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

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it was dark outside so u know what i did....went to sleep

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Three men of different ethnic and socio-economic upbringings enter a pub. A strange situation befalls them or a question is posed. The first two respond in turn, in manners typical of their profession or educational background. The third, however, either draws on his specific expertise and responds so as to outwit the others, or makes an egregious and pun-filled blunder, leaving himself open to mockery by his peers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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