why was the frog sad..... because it was stappled to the boys face

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How many finger does a normal person have? 8...and 2 thumbs!!

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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Why did the money due? Because it fell out of the tree

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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what do u call a gay guy? Marlin Stein and Bryan Carboni

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Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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