What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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TOP KEK

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What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

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What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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what is the coolest thing in the world? hashtag swagbag yolo

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What's worse than stepping on a nail? stepping on the nail and falling on more nails face first.

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops