A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? You throw an awe at it. Why did Sally fall off the swing? .....I missed the clown

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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nicky finds it really hard to get it up.

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what do you call a person who rides a bike a lot? BATMAN!!! -s.s

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Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

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What's worse than a papercut? Dying

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boobs!

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

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Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

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Excuse me waiter! What the hell is this fly doing on my soup? I believe it's swimming on it, sir.

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What did Joe do after the party? He went home.

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whats purple and attacks like a bear? a purple bear

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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what type of cat has green feathers? a green-feathered cat.

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What did the farmer say when he found his tractor? "There's my tractor."

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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