What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

How do you know if someone is vegan? They'll tell you.

Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

You:Knock knock friend:who's there you:come in friend come on who you:come in your mother

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

why did road cross the chicken Niggers love chicken.

what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus.

A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the bag.

How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...