Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

what do u call blue fluff? blue fluff

How many black people did it take to change the light bulb? I couldn't tell, the lights were out.

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

What was Mozart's favorite vegetable? Aspara-gus.

Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

When is the only time you see a Mexican and Black person driving together ? When they feel like it .

How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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