How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Three old ladies were sitting on a bench. A man walks up and flashes them. The first old lady had a stroke. The second old lady had a stroke. The third old lady called 911 out of concern for her two friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7-8-9

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy collect poop? Because it was it was his dogs shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Good afternoon.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

thumb_up thumb_down +3

"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops