Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

What fires shots? A gun

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

What did the black jewish homosexual say to the conquistador? Nothing as they were both from entirely different time periods.

Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

How do you kill a mime? Shoot him in the face.

How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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