Emily Walker.

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A muslim walks into an airport. He then buys his ticket, boards his plane, and his flown to his proper destination.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

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Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

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A man wearing dark sunglasses walks into a convenience store with a dog on a leash. He goes to the middle of the store, and he starts swinging the dog around over his head by the leash. The store clerk comes over and asks, "what are you doing?" The man replies, "Ajiohskdcojqpowuskncvlkzb" Not knowing what else to do, the clerk calls 911. It turns out the man's name is Ruprict, and he has escaped from the local mental institution. A police officer shortly arrives to bring Ruprict back to the hospital.

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Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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Guy: Roses are red, violets are blue, you're beautiful and sexy too. Girl: Roses are red violets are blue, how many girls have you told that to? Guy:... Girl: Exactly.

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A man walked into a bar and asked if he could use the toilet The bartender told him that it was for paying customers only The man walked up to the bartender, ordered a drink and then proceeded to go to the toilet He came back feeling refreshed, finished his drink and said his goodbyes

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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a horse walks into a bar. the barman asks "why the long face". not understanding human language, the horse takes a shit, neighs then leaves

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There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

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A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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