what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

Pickle

You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

why couldnt the man dunk? because he was 3' 2" and a legal midget.

Whys the Elephant afraid of the mouse? i dont know im not an Zoologist

What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

How do you survive the end of the world? You can't- everyone will die!

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

Vagina Boob

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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