Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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What's big and purple? Barney

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What do you get when you cross an owl, with a bungee cord?..... My ass.

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How about that airline food?

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knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

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dyslexics of the world untie!

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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Why did the big refrigerator fall down the cheese Because i licked my own ear and it got scared and cheese for no raiSOnsD

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A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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