Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

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Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

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what long green and bumpy? a pickle

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

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What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

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What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

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Violets are blue, Roses are red, We're doing it backwards, That's what she said.

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Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

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Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

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KNOCK KNOCK WHOSE THERE? AVOCADO AVOCADO WHO AVOCADO COLD THAT'S A RETARD JOKE HAHAHAHAHA GOOD 1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops