Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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(warning- this is sort of funny) A mom takes her son to cvs to pick up her pills. Son- Mom whats a pharmacists? Mom- well sweetie its a person who sells people drugs Monday Morning Teacher- Class, did you learn anything over the weekend? Son- Yah, i learned that my mommy has been taking me with her every week, to a person who sells drugs Later that week Teacher- Yes, hi, um your son has told me that you take him to buy drugs with you, i may have to call social services Mom- what? this is a misunderstanding, i go to a pharmacists to buy drugs. That evening Mom-what did you tell your teacher at school Son- you've been telling me that i go with you to buy drugs Mom- baby i need pills, well, because, im sick. Son- ohhhhhhhhhhhh ok At school Teacher- Billy ive called s.s on your mom, u will be living with foster parents Son- ohhhhhhhhhhhh ok Evening Police- ?Ms. Thackery, is this your student. Teacher- Yes Police- His mom has tradgicly died in a pool of tears after finding out YOU called s.s Mom- what? omg. DAMN Police- Im afraid u r under arrest for the cause of his mothers death Class- yayyyyyyy wooo hooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Billy Billy Billy Billy. hip hip hooray Teacher- Damn Son- mommy? Police- ur mommy's dead, sucks right sooooooo here's a box and ten bucks......... go live your life

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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whats funnier then a joke on anit jokes pracitcally anything cause anti jokes repaeats and everyone has herd them

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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What's funnier than New York City? ADAM STOCK! By Logan in South Dakota

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

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Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

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I used to get on Facebook, then someone asked me to save a child in Africa by liking a picture of Jesus or ignore it and go to hell

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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You're welcome. On to the next house.

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kk

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what smells like tuna? my underwear

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Trampoline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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