why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

hey hey apple

A man walked into a bar owch

Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

Whats green? The color green.

Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

What's short, white, and is sick and tired of your shit? A toilet. What's white and killed Elvis? Also a toilet.

Yo momma is so old that she will be moved to a nursing home next week.

Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H20." The second one says "why did you come to the bar if you're just going to have water?" and orders a beer.

What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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