How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

What did the tourist in Africa get? AIDS

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

What did the joke say to the antijoke? Nothing.

What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

you know whats not funny white boards.

Amanda Knox walks home free.

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

Knock knock ... Guess they aren't home.

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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