I'm Coming

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A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

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What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

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What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely white man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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Why did the man take off his pants A: because they were uncomfortable to sit in

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops