How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what do you get when you cross ruddell with a chicken? still a prick

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call Americans Watching Canadians? Hockey

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What did the terrorist do when he walked into the football stadium? A: Set off a bomb, killing him and others there

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

thumb_up thumb_down -9

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did sally fall of the swing? She had no arms or legs Knock knock who's there? Not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man is a joke for making a joke on antijoke

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops