What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

thumb_up thumb_down +15

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

When did Osama Bin Laden die? Nobody gives a @!?$

thumb_up thumb_down +15

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yo momma is So Fat? And isn't your cousin Chow Yun Fat? I think I know some of the Fat family. How are they all doing?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what is black and looks like a rasberry a blackberry

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops