What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

alex is cool

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

hi michael

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar and have a friendly argument over their religious beliefs.

Granny porn!

You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

what happened to the girl next door ? she was brutally murdered.

What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

What's purple, blue, red, orange, yellow and green. A rainbow .

whats red bubbly and looks out of a windo? a baby in a mocrowave

why did jimmy fall of of the tractor? Because he is a potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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