A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "why the long face" The bartender then sees the horse's broken leg and proceeds to buy him a free drink.

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

why didn't the mexiczn eat the black man's cooking? because it wasn't good

A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

What did the T-Rex say to the chicken? Nothing. First of all because the Tyrannousaurus Rex has been extinct for over 65 million years and secondly because Tyrannousaurus Rex's and chickens are both animals of lower intelligence so they cannot talk to one another.

How many fingers am i holding up? 4

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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