Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

I remember in the 80's it felt like Bill Cosby was being shoved down my throat. He was always on TV with his show and those Jello commercials.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

Whats a joke with no meaning? This one

Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Why did the little boy refuse to kiss his grandmother? He was afraid she would slip him some tongue.

Obama lin Baden.

What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

Face...the other white meat!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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